The Craziest Theory Yet?

Kudos to our buddy Triterope who put this together. Meet David Wynn Miller. Or is that :David-Wynn:Miller?

"My name is David hyphen Wynn full colon Miller," the 53-year-old Milwaukean says, and the brows of his audience of 50 begin to furrow. This crowd of "Patriots" is used to conspiracy theories, but even at an event dominated by antigovernment ideology, Miller is tough going. "The reason I use a full colon and a hyphen in my name, the first full colon, which is full colon David, it means for the David hyphen Wynn. That's my given name, and it's also a noun, because it uses a prepositional phrase. ... Because I use prepositional phrases, through punctuation, which is classified as hieroglyphics, which makes me a life, l-i-f-e. Now, when you don't punctuate your name... David is an adjective, Wynn is an adjective, Miller is a pronoun. Two adjectives are a condition of modification, opinion, presumption, which modifies the pronoun, pro means no on noun. So therefore, I'm not a fact. I'm a fiction."

Sounds like Louis Farrakhan in some of his less lucid moments. Miller has a theory about the World Trade Center that makes Steven Jones and Richard Gage look almost sane:

When the Sept. 11 attacks occurred, the Center towers collapsed in six seconds, Miller says, not the 12 seconds it would have taken normal matter. Plus, all the concrete turned to dust. Having discovered the "mathematical interface that all steel is plastic" some years back, Miller understands perfectly what "the physics of plastic" is trying to tell him: A magnetic pulse brought down the towers.

What creates a magnetic pulse? C-4 plastic explosive. Who has C-4? The military. Who controls the military? The post office.

And there you have it. Postal authorities sneaked into the towers, replacing all chairs, tables and file cabinets with plastic furniture. Explosive plastic furniture. The steel in the building � well, that was plastic steel, and it was utterly destroyed by the C-4, which is only capable of destroying other plastic "polymers."

"That's what gave us certification that it was an inside job," Miller explains.

At the moment of collapse, $12 trillion was transferred electronically from the basement of the trade center to Singapore. "The World Trade Center was a bank robbery," Miller reveals, "very cleverly engineered."

It's admitted, as Alex Jones would say. Now you might think that the Southern Poverty Law Center (where this article is located) has been unfair in describing Miller's thesis, but here he or one of his devotees (scroll down to blueymorgan's post) explains it:

After watching Soooooo many videos on the subject, have any of you measured the amount of time it took for the buildings to fall, from the time they actually began to fall,.............6.2 seconds.......Impossible!! Under normal circumstances of demolition and using the figures for gravity, those buildings should have taken over 12 seconds to reach ground zero, so obviously anyone in the running for the millionaire's money should give up now. Why? Your'e all using the explosion theory! Turn off your TV's and think for yourselves for a change.
Oh, by the way, did anyone notice the only thing floating down from the buildings was paper, but no furniture nor filing cabinets that held that paper, nor were there any found amid the wreckage?
Add to this, the extra buildings in the WTC complex, which collapsed within the next 24 hours, due to the structural integrity of those same buildings being compromised due to the same EM pulse, (which by the way, took approximately 5 milliseconds)
So take a back seat and listen up................GRAVITY WAS REMOVED from the equation using EM technology, which has been tested, AND has been Congress approved!!!
Technology,... which does not belong to a person sitting in a cave in Afghanistan.
The planes were there for the worldwide audience to get angry, and point a finger at whoever they told you to get angry at!

Now, you're probably seeing a few flaws in that argument, one of which gets pointed out immediately by "Howard Roark":

Well if gravity was removed from the equation, then how come the towers fell down?

And here is where it really gets bananas:

It really amazes me that most people on this planet cannot fathom the english language.
Don't you realise that gravity also holds things UP as well as bring things down.....didn't pass physics at school huh?

! But it continues:

Four weeks before the event took place, a very significant amount of world-shattering events took place under everyone's nose without a whimper from the press, and they were:
~1. The towers were purchased by the Port Authority of New York, which of course is run by the Post Office. (check, if you don't believe)
~2. Most of the furniture in both buildings was changed to new and very ornate plastic stuff. (Why?)
~3. The day before the event, postal-inspectors were to commandeer the $30 billion in gold bullion, plus the $12 Trillion in bank credits, (stored in the WTC) as part payment on a $400 Billion lawsuit which the U.S. government was ordered to pay to the World Court.

Wow, that's a trifecta of stupid. The buildings were leased by the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey to Larry Silverstein and his partners. The Port Authority is not run by the Post Office; that's ridiculous.

Second, nobody has presented me with any evidence that most of the furniture in both buildings was changed to new and very ornate plastic stuff. You have to consider the enormous size of these buildings. This is not moving around the furniture in your living room, we're talking about tens of thousands of desks, cubicles, filing cabinets, etc.

And that $400 billion judgment story sure sounds like it's James' old buddy Ambassador Leo Wanta.

Miller has his own website here, but if you can make heads or tails of it you're better than I.

Update: More Miller insanity here on the tax protesting theme:

It is important that you know what really happened when I used so-called technology by Miller.

At my hearing for arraignment and plea February 17, 1998, I used the "flag" issue and the approach that I would not join with the court pursuant to F.R.Civ.P. 12(b)(7). That day I left court having not joined with the court. However, the following day I was arrested by U. S. Marshals and incarcerated at Halawa State Prison with the presumed threat that I would be held as a threat to the state if I did not submit to the court's jurisdiction.

Prior to my arrest on Friday the 19th of 1998, I filed a "Title 42 Action" that was advocated by Miller. He will say that this is passe' now, but the reason I mention it was the fact that in a subsequent hearing the U. S. Prosecutor noted it and said that it was incomprehensible. Nothing else transpired other than the fact that I let the "42" action time lapse. Reason? Number one I could foresee it being held against me as a identified "tax protestor" as well as an activist for pure water in Hawaii locally, and the fact that I had been involved in many other initiatives regarding the return to Constitutional Rule of Law by the government. [My group was known as the "Phoenix Project Committee of 50 States" and aligned with Joe Stumph out of Utah. Morris Dees, a Khazarian Zionist B'nai B'rith Mosad agent, SUBVERSIVE, of the "Souther Poverty Law Center" (I am sure dedicated to perpetuation of "poverty" using law as a method to insure its existence [READ R. BUCKMINSTER FULLER'S GRUNCH OF GIANTS, ST. MARTIN PRESS, 1983]) identified our "group" as a militia support group in a document regarding what he identified as "terrorist organizations."]. The second reason was that I had seen the irrationality of the idea that I would ever prevail in any of the controlled Zionist courts. It is impossible at this time but may be appropriate as we uncover the lies.

Note: It appears that page is written by a tax protesting nut who finds Miller nutty.

Hat Tip: Dylan Unsavory.