Monday, October 30, 2006

The First Rule of Conspiracy Theories

I am starting to think that the first rule of conspiracy theories, is that the conspirators will make the plot as complicated as possible for no reason. I was trying to find some record of last Saturday's Reynolds\Wood speech in Seattle, but have been unlucky so far. Fortunately I came across this bit of recent Morgan Reynolds nuttery for your entertainment (emphasis added):

The technology was publicly available in 2003, so it is possible the military had developed it earlier. Such a plane might have taken off from Stewart Air base in Newburgh, NY, the alleged crossover point of the flight paths of Flights 11 and 175. The soon-to-turn-invisible plane would blend in with a radar inject and become the new radar blip. The aircraft could have been remote controlled to fly by the south tower on its east side or piloted by a human. The plane would time its "switch to invisibility" at the south tower with nearly simultaneous ignition of internal charges in the tower. It would all happen within the space of two seconds, stunning everyone. The spectacular fireball on the east side of the south tower went off too fast to be natural and it did not burn at the so-called impact hole where oxygen and fuel would be abundant, so it was a trick. It performed its role of being a spectacular distraction to further hide the fly by and was an Independence Day terror event on its own. The plane's engines presumably would have been quieted to enhance the realism of the feigned crash, perhaps essentially gliding for moments. It then headed out to sea for destruction if remote controlled or more likely it landed at a secret base because it would have been expensive "one-off" technology.

I love the part where he speculates that the "invisible remote controlled plane" may have been flown out to sea and destroyed. Yeah, that makes sense, rather then just a) blow up the building, or b) crash a plane into the bulding, it is much simpler to use Klingon cloaking technology to fake the crash, then blow up the building, then fly the plane off, only to destroy it later.

Amazingly Area 51 even gets mentioned. Of course if you mention Area 51 theories to 9/11 deniers they will accuse you of ad hominem attacks to distract from the "real issues".

When charged to a certain voltage, these panels undergo color change. Another similar 'skin' is being tested at the top-secret Groom Lake facility at Area 51 in Nevada.

Although he doesn't specifically mention aliens....

16 Comments:

At 30 October, 2006 13:37, Blogger Stevew said...

They used Wonder Woman's invisible plane

 
At 30 October, 2006 14:26, Blogger remdem said...

You know, this is like turning over rocks when you were a kid to see what kind of strange bugs you could find, only now we're all (mostly) adults and it's not strange anymore, it's really just pathetic.

 
At 30 October, 2006 15:04, Blogger Ransom said...

The aircraft could have been remote controlled to fly by the south tower on its east side or piloted by a human. The plane would time its "switch to invisibility" at the south tower with nearly simultaneous ignition of internal charges in the tower. It would all happen within the space of two seconds, stunning everyone.

I'm only stunned at the amazing stupidity of this conjecture.

The plane that hit the south tower didn't "switch to invisibility" then do a really close fly-by of the building. It flew directly into the side of the building. The nose hit the building, then the wings hit the building, then the tail hit the building, then it exploded inside the building.

Or did Reynolds mention a holographic plane at some point that just didn't get included in this transcription?

 
At 30 October, 2006 15:07, Blogger Stevew said...

I had to reread it to make sure of what I read, WOW this guy is loose on the streets. I could not make up crap like this if I tried

 
At 30 October, 2006 15:30, Blogger Manny said...

OK, so he's insane, and that's fine. But this guy speaks to entire roomfuls of people, not one of whom stands up and points out that he's nucking futs. How can you gather that many people from someplace other than a mental institution and not find one single person to start giggling?

 
At 30 October, 2006 15:48, Blogger Nyke said...

I thought the first rule of CTs was that considering how much time and effort they put in, to be caught by simple people, the conspirators would have to be simultaneously the smartest and dumbest people alive.

 
At 30 October, 2006 15:56, Blogger Stevew said...

Manny it truley boggles tha mind

 
At 30 October, 2006 21:20, Blogger Simon Lazarus said...

Wait - so now the 9/11 airplanes were "invisible"?

Can one of these nutjobs come up with just a single theory as to what they think happened? Because the 2 planes/no planes/invisible planes thing has me completely baffled.

 
At 30 October, 2006 21:59, Blogger Richard said...

Duh! It was a quantum plane!! It was like totally there and not there at the same time man! That's why it melted into the towers, it was made of superstrings!

 
At 31 October, 2006 00:23, Blogger The Girl in Grey said...

I agree, that DOES seem to be the first rule of conspiracy theories. But then what do they say to the OTHER nutcases who say a plane DID hit the towers? (Conspiracy theorists yell at each other for hours)

 
At 31 October, 2006 06:04, Blogger pomeroo said...

Manny makes an excellent point. There are always raving lunatics among us. Cultural decline results from those lunatics infecting the mainstream. What Charles Krauthammer termed "Bush Derangement Syndrome" is a good example of the creeping mental illness of our society.

I have never understood how people can allow distaste for the policies of a particular politician to mutate into pathological hatred. If you oppose Bush's tax cuts or his vision for the Middle East, argue against them; work to defeat him and his party at the polls. Why surrender your own rationality and self-respect by mindlessly cheering every psycho who conjures up fantastic, nonsensical smears?

 
At 31 October, 2006 06:48, Blogger Swing Dangler said...

All this guy does is muddy the water with outlandish conspiracy theories!

 
At 31 October, 2006 07:56, Blogger CHF said...

LOL!

What's the difference between an "outlandish" 9/11 conspiracy theory and a regular conspiracy theory?

Is "no planes" any more credible than "they rigged up 220 WTC tower floors with bombs and no one noticed?"

 
At 31 October, 2006 09:54, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh.

My.

God.

 
At 31 October, 2006 10:51, Blogger Triterope said...

Manny makes an excellent point. There are always raving lunatics among us. Cultural decline results from those lunatics infecting the mainstream.

"Lunatics infecting the mainstream" is right. I fear this minimal acceptance of conspiracy theory is another negative outcome of political correctness: everyone in this country has been so conditioned not to criticize anyone for anything, ever, that no one will even question things that are pathologically stupid and easily disprovable.

As an aside, I think this is why South Park is so popular. It's the one place where some beliefs are actually beneath discussion. If somebody on this show tried to argue that the WTC were destroyed by invisible planes, Stan and Kyle would just say "Dude, that's retarded," and walk away. It warms my heart just thinking about it.

 
At 31 October, 2006 15:33, Blogger The Artistic Macrophage said...

All this guy does is muddy the water with outlandish conspiracy theories!

kind of like saying that someone is covering all the horse crap with pig crap. Its still all crap!

TAM

 

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