Listening to Alex Jones
I hadn't listened to an entire episode of Alex for awhile, and since Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag were supposed to appear I thought I'd listen in to the June 30, 2009 program.
Hilariously Alex starts out talking about how he's never heard of Spencer, doesn't understand Twitter (okay, I just figured it out myself), and that Spencer and Heidi have "tabloid fame".
Heidi's buddy Perez would not be happy with one part of Alex's first hour. Alex says something about how he's not opposed to gay marriage, but that he's upset that all of the divorce court judges are lesbians or gay, and they make sure to place "our" children with gay couples.
The bit starts about 48 minutes into the first hour with Alex talking about eugenics, and how supposedly the Planned Parenthood home page has all this stuff about same sex marriage.
"I don't like that your culture doesn't produce children, so you gotta come rob ours. See you're like, oh, just let me have my rights, and do what I want in my own bedroom. Go ahead, I'm not obsessed with that, I'm not hung up on that, like all the fake Republican leaders who are all constantly caught in bathrooms and trying to bugger children. I'm not obsessed and hung up on it.
"But I do know that almost every family court judge I've studied in the country that seizes kids is a lesbian or a gay man, and they feed the kids to the child protection system that then give them to gay and lesbian families, and I'm telling you, your headhunting of children is bad news and very very wicked, and you know what? You're committing a crime and you need to face up to the fact that you don't reproduce, so decide that you're not going to have children."
How do I parody that?
Update: I listened to the segment with Montag, and she comes off as a 22-year-old "end times" Jesus freak. (Clarification: No insult intended to religious people; I just can't stand the "end times" people.) The husband doesn't say much after the stoned-out "Wow!" when he finds out that like his dad, Alex's dad was a dentist. Alex is praying that somehow Miley Cyrus (who mistakenly listens to Heidi's tweets) will somehow appear on his show.
BTW, maybe I shouldn't mention it, but both Heidi and her hubby have misspelled infowars twitter account as Inforwars, and so now some debunker has claimed that Twittery or whatever cutesy phrase I'm supposed to use for one's Twitter location, and already 224 people are following the tweets over there.
Update II: Here's video of the first ten minutes or so:
I did some poking around the web on "Speidi" (their cutesy name for themselves), and apparently they are the couple that America loves to hate:
“They are everything that’s wrong with America,” executive vice president of alternative programming for NBC and Universal Media Studios, Paul Telegdy, said in a statement to Access Hollywood. “They are insincere, lazy, entitled and they claim the devil has possessed them.”
I also like this quote:
Yes, Heidi has a sort of goofball music “career,” but it looks more like she releases terrible records to hold her position as a hated laughingstock than like she’s leveraging her notoriety to become a singer.